Q: What is life? Why are we living this life? I don't understand.
A: Get married and have kids, you will not have the time to think about this question
After few years of getting married, the question remains...
Q: If you want, go ahead and adopt a baby, but you should also have a baby of your own.
A: If I adopt, that baby will be my own, why bear one more?
Q: You should have a baby of your own blood
A: As a matter of fact, it's highly likely that my baby won't even have my own blood group. So how can it be the same blood. I have donated blood few times..there are some people in this world who have my blood now and I don't even know them. They have my blood :-)
After some time....
Q: Why are you refusing to have a baby of your own? After marriage, everyone should have a baby, that's what the whole world is doing?
A: Just because the whole world is doing something, it need not be the correct thing for me. I do not feel the need to have a daughter or a son, so why should I give birth to a kid?
Q: You may not realize it now, maybe after 10 or 20 years, you will regret this decision
A: How can you be so sure? The reason why people go for children is because they think that it completes their life or because it's just a by-product of their relationship. I do not want a kid for either of these reasons. If I need a kid to make me feel complete, I will have one. But that's not the case. It's very inappropriate to say that a woman becomes a "complete woman" only after she bears a kid.
Q: Why are you so adamant? What is your problem? What is stopping you from having kids?
A: Imagine you are in a Apple farm given to you, just for you alone. You have enough apples to feed you for a lifetime. These trees were planted by someone else and you desire for something of your own. So you go about planting trees and wait for it to give you apples. You might feel happy. You will then start tending to these trees and forget the ones that were already there. Without any care and maintenance, those trees will perish. The apples from those trees would have been wasted. Isn't it foolish to create new ones when there is so much to take care of?
There is so much life on this earth that need care and love. Why create a new one?
10 comments:
Amen!
(Last two sentences)
I can foresee some of these questions coming to me in the next few years :)
Your last few sentences(There are already so many lives to be taken care of, why create more?)are very touching. Salute thee!!
Aren't we limiting ourselves by thinking "pure love" is possible only with a child? First of all, I cannot call anything as 'impure love', it is just that we misunderstand a lot of our needs in relationships as 'love'. That is why we are using the term "pure love" to differentiate love from need.
Few years before, I would have agreed to you that a relationship between a child and the mother is the deepest and the purest. But not any more, I have experienced the deepest form of love, though only on a few occasions (Thanks to Isha Yoga). This has made me realize it is possible to experience the deepest love even without any object to receive it or return it(Child\Friend\Lover\God). I had not even conceived of such a possibility before Isha Yoga. Now my only goal in life is to make this a way of life rather than experiencing it in a few rare moments. Life will never be the again for me and I am glad it is so!! Those few moments changed my life forever!!
Radha, I laughed reading your first comment, good luck :-)
Exactly Rams. Ur words are worthful. People like me cant able to express the innerself and also cant able to lead with what is happening. I feel u r just very frank. And really there must be more courage for any decision to make and to follow. Hats off to the courage of you & NASA. I bow to you. Let all good happen to you two in coming days.
Sooper Post Ramsi! :)
Endearingly frank one! Lots of plain sense without any stiffling feministic nonsense.
ABSURD!!If U are soo clear with that, The PERSON WHO GAVE REPLIES SHOULD NOT HAVE GOT MARRIED. He/She shud have joined in some ashramam.......
The questions are so familiar.
One's biological parents (like any other individual) are feeling/thinking/behaving in the best way that would favor *their* genes. So that is understandable.
Whereas feeling obligated towards one's biological parents or the society's wishes is another game altogether. That too is based upon genetic reasons but at the expense of personal freedom and individuality. There is no sense at all in investing on the survival of my genes at the expense of my own lifestyle preferences and well-being.
What is the most wondrous of all of this is the fact that it is possible to live an individualistic lifestyle without being rebellious (rather feeling cheerful) towards the very people/society that is imposing the silly moral/familial values.
There is no need to bring "love" into the argument.
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